Something happened recently that really pushed my passion to the limit.
My practical chocolate skills are very very rusty having not worked professionally with chocolate for almost a year, and it shows, it really really shows. You can have all the knowledge and passion in the world, even if I do say so myself, chocolate knowledge is something I have a lot of, some of it kinda useless, like my knowledge of Henry Isaac Rowntree’s pets and some of it kinda useful, like the science of cocoa butter, but passion and knowledge can’t carry you through everything. Especially when practical skills are very important when one wants to become a chocolatier.
After a day spent crying and questioning everything, ie, my career choice, passion, this blog, life, I scraped up the Ellie sized mess that was crumpled on my bedroom floor and tried to sort myself out. I’ve not come out of this unscathed, not at all, my confidence is in tatters, and my pride a little bit bruised. For the first time, my passion was pushed to the limit, it was bound to happen at some point, and it has probably only taken so long because i’ve been in the sheltered uni bubble for as long as I’ve had this obsession with Chocolate.
Now i’ve *somewhat* stopped ripping myself to shreds, I am ready to start again. Sometimes, having your passion, friendships, relationships or whatever pushed to the limits can illustrate how genuine and real they are. As much as I am worried and scared now, because real life is about to hit me in the face and I have no plan, I am more determined than ever to achieve what I want; skills can be learnt and perfected with practice. Passion is something that can’t be learnt, or perfected with practice. Passion is special and sadly, I feel somewhat rare in todays society and as long as that is still intact (which it is, very much so), it’ll take me to where I want to be, just not as soon as I would have liked.
Apologies for the vagueness, but I thought this was worth writing about, incase anyone else can relate, and needs a little bit of comfort and encouragement.